Have you seen the movie Courageous?
Personally it is my favorite church movie to watch not only because of the deep message of the importance of fatherhood, but because it is freaking hilarious! One day my roommates and I were watching church movies after church one day and we were thing about other movies we could watch. They brought up Facing the Giants, Fireproof and I was like, have you guys seen Courageous? They hadn't and I was like you have to watch it. I explained what the movie was a little bit and they agreed to give it a try and they love it now, too! So there we were, laughing together and crying (not me of course) watching this amazing movie.
The movie is about sheriff's deputy Adam Mitchell who endures a terrible personal tragedy that causes him to question what is really important to him. Taking comfort in his religion, he vows to become a better parent to his teenage son and tells his friends on and off the force about a pledge he wants to sign and end up signing the pledge with him. The pledge is that they will all strive to become better better fathers. Each man has different struggles with fatherhood, divorce, money, boys trying to date his daughter, just to name a few.
Why start off my blog like this? First of all I really love that movie. Secondly, it really shows the importance of fathers. The entire movie is about how we need good fathers and what that really means. At the end of the movie, Adam is asked to speak in church about this pledge he created and he really emphasizes the role of fathers. In part of his speech he says,
“... I now believe that God desires for every father to courageously step up and do whatever it takes to be involved in the lives of his children. But more than just being there or providing for them, he's to walk with them through their lives and be a visual representation of the character of God, their father in heaven. A father should love his children and seek to win their hearts. He should protect them, discipline them and teach them about God. He should model how to walk with integrity and treat others with respect and should call out his children to become responsible men and women who live their lives for what matters in eternity. Some men will hear this and mock it or ignore it. But I tell you that as a father, you are accountable to God for the position of influence he has given you. You can't fall asleep at the wheel only to wake up one day and realize that your job or your hobbies have no eternal value but the souls of your children do.”
There’s a lot more to his speech but that last part, “You can't fall asleep at the wheel only to wake up one day and realize that your job or your hobbies have no eternal value but the souls of your children do,” is probably my favorite part.
Being a parent is hard. Long nights negotiating with a little terrorist who wants food sleep and a fresh diaper change while at the same time wanting none of those things and whose only goal in life seems to take away not only all of your sanity but sleep as well. But when they grow older, it gets better, right? Right? Wrong. Then they grow into a bigger terrorist who follows you around like a puppy some days and others wants nothing to do with you, at the same time asking the question, ‘why’ for every little thing you say. From there they grow into teenagers, enough said having been one myself. But you would do it all over again just to see your little baby become a baby again, your little boy or girl. Which is why that last phrase is so important.
You’re children are what matter most. You can’t just abandon them when they are old enough to take care of themselves, or at least smart enough to turn on the t.v to entertain themselves, to pursue your own pointless game of candy crush or work more over time at the office and miss their soccer game (no matter how pointless the game might seem). Children need you now more than ever while the world continues to grow against families. Don’t prove the world right, because we need families more than ever, and an important part of families are fathers.
Each parent has a special role to play in the development of their children. As stated before in a previous blog post, men and women are different.
If you were to ask a woman to show how they would hold a crying baby, she would most likely show that she is holding the baby’s face towards her. 
Ask the same question to a man and he would most likely show the he is holding the baby’s face away from him.
One explanation of this is because fathers tend to prepare their children for the outside world and mothers prepare them for the home more. We need to prepare our children for both which is why we need mothers and fathers to work together to teach their children what they need to know. It’s a mother’s instinct to hold their children close, to protect them like a mother goose does. But fathers balance this effect by bringing them outside of the safety of the home and helping them to guide through the chaos. Which is why the role of fathers is so important.
Yet we keep fathers way from the home. If we go back to the beginning of time, families were together. At the time of Adam and Eve, they worked together to work the land and raise their family. Adam’s job? Farming, which meant that was with his family a lot. This pattern of fathers working with their family continued even in Jesus’s day. Fathers had their trades in their homes and so they could still be with their families. But it was during the industrial revolution that fathers began to work away from the home, and their families. And that trend hasn’t changed since. It had to, but just because it had to change doesn’t mean that it was necessarily a good thing. It is now keeping fathers out of their homes and out of the lives of their children.
But just because fathers have to work out of the home doesn't mean they have to keep out of their children’s lives. Yes it will take a lot of work and sacrifice, but like the quote from before said, “You can't fall asleep at the wheel only to wake up one day and realize that your job or your hobbies have no eternal value but the souls of your children do.” What is worth more? Your children or your own personal interests? I’m not saying you can’t have your own life if you have kids, you can. But if your so spending too much time with those things and they are getting in the way of your children, something needs to change.
Parenthood isn’t easy. Motherhood isn’t easy. Fatherhood isn’t easy either. But your allowed to make mistakes and try different things. You just have to do your very best.
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